TVLINE | Did you always want to come back for a second shot?
To be completely transparent, I was called — I think I can say this now — I was called for Season 40 before it was “Winners at War.” I was asked to play “40,” but they called me one month after the “David vs. Goliath” finale, so we’re talking January of 2019, and I respectfully declined and I said I’m just not ready yet. I need more time. It’s not a no forever, but it’s a no right now and I meant it. I always said if the timing’s right and if I feel like the moment’s right, then I’d love to try one more time, and here we are! We’re out here for one more time, Season 50. Is it perfect timing? No, I have two daughters that are really young, and it’s gonna be the hardest thing. It already is the hardest thing to be away from them. It’s only been a week, but that being said, I’m harnessing all of that emotion to inspire my game, and to motivate me to win it this time.
TVLINE | Who were you most excited to see out here, outside of your former castmates?
Outside of my Goliath bros, I am really excited to see some of these powerful women out here. I cannot wait to play with Chrissy. I’m excited to play with Cirie, Aubry… oh, there’s too many to even… I want to create a powerhouse. Honestly, I think the 30s are gonna run it. Rick Devens, I’m excited to see Rick. I think the 30s are gonna be the swing. I think we’re gonna be the power. I think we’re gonna be the bridge between the old and the new. We’ve played the old format, but we’re recent enough that we’re not old yet, and for me, I’m actually coming in stronger this time than I was last time. I’m 35 now versus 28, so I feel more ready than ever. I’m really excited to play with some of these people, even the legends, how could I forget, Cirie, Ozzy, and Coach too. Coach is probably the biggest character to ever play this game. Q. I’m ready to play with my other characters. Let’s have some fun. I want to play hide and seek with Q. I want to have Coach lead a guided meditation. We’re out here. Let’s do something with it, you know what I mean? You’re never gonna catch me sitting around being bored. Not while I’m on the beach with these folks. It’s going to be so much fun.
TVLINE | Who needs to be the first boot?
Oh man, there’s always gotta be a first boot. Look, I am superstitious, so I’ll preface this with saying none of us are immune, OK? I’m not trying to tempt the “Survivor” gods. Don’t let it be me. It can’t be me, alright? It’s not gonna be me. My threat level’s so low, OK? I think there’s two scenarios for the first boot. 1) It could very potentially be one of the two people from Season 49. We just have very little information about them. At this moment in time, their season has not aired, so we don’t know anything about them besides their names and what their faces look like. We don’t know how they played. We don’t know how far they made it. We don’t know nada about them, alright? And so, that’s a mystery box, and in “Survivor,” the less mystery, the more information you have, the better. So, I think one of them could be a first boot. Or it could be someone who’s just so threatening, right? It could be a winner, if people think, you know what? They already got their flowers. They got their money. Their bank account’s happy. Maybe it’s one of them. Just anyone but me and Mike, alright?
TVLINE | What did you do wrong last time and how are you going to course correct it?
Where do I start? [Laughs] Look, my first time playing this game… I’ve had the benefit of time. I’ll say that it’s been seven years, so a lot has happened in my life since then. I’ve become a mother. I’ve started a business. I’ve lived 20% more life than I [did] last time I played, and it was a lot of life, right? Pandemic, just a lot of stuff. I also have the benefit of watching my season back, which is always eye-opening, and it was humbling for me. It was really humbling to watch it back and be like, “Oh, yeah, I pushed the envelope too much there,” or had too much confidence there, or did that move without really thinking. It was a little impulsive. So, I’ve been able to see all that and learned more about myself from it. So, I think I’m coming in a lot more self-aware, a lot more patient, a lot more “me.”
I told Jeff and all those guys during my interviews, I’m more confident than I was before, which for them is hard to believe because I know that I’m very confident, but I really feel more like myself. I feel like I can bring all of myself to bear, not just that hyper-aggressive, dominant side, but also the softer side and the motherly side. I think I actually have the benefit of coming in having played the game that I played because people see me as just the girl who was asking for the jacket, right? I know that. I’m OK with that. I was cold! I stand by that. Should I have asked Natalie five times? No, that was crazy, and that was not editing. I actually did ask her five times, so I’ll own that. But look. I know my reputation. All you can do is laugh about things that you do. That’s what I tell my husband all the time. You’re never gonna be bored, alright? So, I’ll say that to you too. You’re never gonna be bored.
But this time around, I’m coming in as a different person. I am just more grounded. I’m still gonna bring all that fun and creativity because I can’t help that, but the difference this time is that I’m always going to do things with a “why,” always things with intention. My husband and Kara told me to do less. I think it’s about that a little bit, but also doing more when it’s the right time and knowing when it’s the right time for things, But really just having good depth to my existing relationships, forming new relationships, and freaking bringing some joy and some fun to camp. I think we need a player who has a comeback story. I think mine would be a huge swing to go from being the ladder girl and the waterfall and the no jacket to being hopefully, my plan, my hope, is to be a really dominant, strategic, savvy, smart player on “50” who again, is just as fun, but also a lot smarter.
